10) You’re between the ages of 25-45
If you’re in this overly wide demographic, and enjoyed watching Saturday morning cartoons as a child, Tales of the Dim Knight will bring back great memories of shows like Superfriends, Batman: The Animated Series, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Batman (the 1960s series version), Underdog, and Darkwing Duck.
We even had one hopeful marketing conversation with a Mr. Terrance Mann, who said, “People will come, Adam. They’ll most definitely come. They’ll come to you to ask about the book, as innocent as children, longing for the past. ‘We don’t mind if you buy a copy,’ you’ll say, ‘it’s just $10.95 for paperback, $4.25 on Kindle, and $5.95 for all other e-book readers.’ They’ll hand over the money without a second thought. Because it’s money they have and wholesome laughter they lack.”
Or something like that.
9) We Have a Cool Cover
Payno attention to the old saying, “You can’t judge a book by its cover.” Instead, think:
“Cool cover equals really cool book.” And then take a look at this cover by Holly Heisey
Need I say more? No, but a top ten list that stops with the second item on the list and lists it as 9) is too weird even for me.
8) The Superhero Team Up
If you’re a warm-blooded superhero fan, nothing warms your heart like superheroes joining forces to take on really bad dudes. Whether it’s Batman and Superman, Spider-man and Daredevil, or even Darkwing Duck and Gizmoduck, a team up makes the story more exciting. So in Tales of the Dim Knight, Powerhouse joins forces with three other heroes in a battle in which the stakes are (of course), the future of all mankind.
7) Real Christian Characters
The media portrayal of Christians is usually pretty annoying. At one extreme, you have the hypocrites and crazy psychopaths spouting Bible verses that inhabit much of the media. At the other extreme, you have the all-too-perfect characters who act like they memorized Evidence that Demands a Verdict and a dozen other pop Christian books.
With our Christian characters, we seek to introduce you to real, decent-hearted folks who try to do the best they can, but don’t always know the right thing to say and don’t always come off well. Sound like anyone you know?
6) Great Superhero Gadgets
Consider just a few of the devices featured in Tales of the Dim Knight: a rocket pack, an airship that shrinks down to pocket-sized, a shape-shifting key, force fields, a 50-foot giant robot, shock collars, and a cloaking device that hides all the furniture in the room. To paraphrase one of our characters, we have more hardware than True Value.
5) It’s Serialized Fiction
As my work at Laser and Sword will attest, I’m a huge fan of serial fiction. Reading Tales of the Dim Knight is like watching a season of your favorite superhero show, as he battles for honesty and fair play in his continuous skirmish against evil. While underlying threads weave through out each story, Dave has a wide variety of adventures to please your palette.
4) Multiple Secret Identities
Unlike some poor superheroes who have only one alter ego, Mild-Mannered Janitor Dave Johnson actually has three alter egos in the course of the book: Powerhouse, the Red Flame, and the Emerald Avenger. It’s three heroes for the price of one.
3) Great Villains
Great Superhero stories require great villains, and in Tales of the Dim Knight, Powerhouse battles a veritable rogue’s gallery of classic villains. Marco Silvano is the father of a mob family who has a soft spot for his kids, Night Lord is a drug lord who refuses to do any hit jobs before evening. The old-fashioned Diablo believes in the tried and true villain methods of tying victims above pools of acid and contends there’s no such thing as too much high explosives. Ahmed is an Islamic terrorist threatening to blow up Megalopolis. Leona Campbell is an ice queen divorce attorney and self-help guru who teaches there’s way too much loyalty in the world.
2) A Family Story
Tales of the Dim Knight has a serious side. Dave becoming a superhero puts a strain on his family when he doesn’t tell his wife his secret and she suspects he’s cheating on her. At the same time, she finds herself attracted to Powerhouse. Can the Johnson family survive Dave’s superpowers?
1) It’s Lots of Laughs
All seriousness aside, Tales of the Dim Knight parodies countless superhero tropes, supervillain tropes, and even some non-comics stuff, such as a speed-dating scene that features a tactless detective. You’ll laugh until you stop laughing. It’s guaranteed to be the funniest novel you’ll read this year.*
*Legal Disclaimers: This guarantee is not valid, and hence a reason for a cause of action, in foreign countries, Alaska, Hawaii, U.S. Territories, commonwealths, or protectorates, or the Continental United States. In addition, the guarantee is valid only for novels which feature both superheroes and speed dating and were published in November 2010. Void where prohibited.
Safety Advisory: Be advised that reading this book while drinking may cause you to laugh so hard your drink spews out your nose. Should not be read while operating heavy machinery.
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